romantic reads

In about two weeks, several members of this blog will journey to the great Gulf of Mexico for a relaxing vacay. For me, it will be a continued extension of the teacher summer. Homegirl is lucky! However, just because I'm already on vacation, doesn't mean I can't continue to live it up. So I am really looking forward to one major thing: reading trashy romance novels on the shores of Mustang Island with four of my favorite ladieeeez. I found some great titles like My Tall, Dark Greek Boss and Housekeeper to the Millionaire (my secret harlequin dream). So, in honor of that exciting time we have to look forward to, here are some of the best romance novel covers the interweb has to offer. Some sick, all satisfying.

Love in another time, another place is so ambiguous. Tell me where this g.d. novel is taking place so I might actually buy it. I guess I'm supposed to be clued in by the "Futuristic Romance" information up top. Oh, great, he's a Martian. Real original.



Either that guy is extremely out of proportion or that cat is huge. Either way, this book sucks and you know it. I would kind of like to know what that cat is up to, though. He looks sneaky and like a little bit of a baller. Let's be real.



Oh, great. Is this Duncan? Well, at least he has nice hair. I ordered those boots from Minnetonka about three years ago and they are surprisingly warm. I do have a lot of questions, though. How did Duncan get this cove? Who is painting in the background? Why does Duncan feel the need to wear suede shoes on the beach? Gawd, he must be balmy.



This has got to be a joke. At least I hope so. I mean, it's seriously hard to tell because most romance novel covers have a shirtless dude. He's a little too cocky for my taste. But also kind of a badass. I mean, buttonless AND blind. I totally just changed my opinion of him. He's a huge baller. I mean, who rides around on a horse without a care in the world and he can't even SEE!? Awesome and tight. Also, is that the Tara estate in the background?



LOLOLOLOL.
This is supposed to sell me on the book. This guy. He's wearing a Seinfeld puffy shirt and looks like he just farted. He must really be able to carry this story. Also, isn't it ballsy to assume that this guy is "perfection?" He needs some major hair changes and some way better fitting pants, in my opinion.



First of all, what the f is a viscountess? Secondly, why all the puffy shirts? Thirdly, why was this photo taken in a Fredericksburg bed and breakfast circa 1993. I see no relevance to anything in life at all.



She doesn't look that defiant to me. She's clearly going along with this bathtub scheme right about now. Also, is that Pierce Brosnan?



Did you know that NASCAR produced romance novels? I sure didn't. There is a ton of them on Amazon, I fully encourage you to check out the other titles. They are all as clever as this one. This better be about taking it slow and practicing abstinence. Either that, or this guy have a serious obsession with wax figures because that girl looks f-ed.