something old i like #4: animated rudolph

I love that old Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer special from the 60s. The animation is out of this world, and the characters are intense. This was the very first DVD I ever owned, thanks to my dad. Literally. I got a DVD player and had no DVDs, and my dad came through. I love this show. Of course, it comes on every year at Christmas, and I'm obsessed with Christmas (can I get a witness, Casey?) but I still say, WHY WAIT. Sometimes I pull out the Rudolph DVD and (wait for it) play it on my computer. I'M A REBEL. But seriously, it's just that good.

Rudolph is born to one of Santa's current studs of the sky and has a bright red nose. RUH ROH. So he runs away because no one will let him join in any reindeer games. Also, Christmas is going pretty badly in the North Pole and Santa Claus is on the Nicole Richie diet. Rudy feels like maybe he won't be able to help St. Nick anyway. When he runs away, he meets Hermey, the elf who desires to be a dentist because he sucks at making toys. As a kid, I thought this guy was baller, but he has a pretty freaky mouth.

Rudy and Hermey band together and along the way, meet Yukon Cornelius, who is one of the biggest ballers ever created. This guy. When he throws his ice pick and then licks it, and says, "...Nothing." Well, that is just the epitome of greatness. Yukon is chasing the Abominable Snowman, who turns out to be kind of a softie in the end.

The crew tries to 23-skidoo to the Island of Misfit Toys, aka the Island of Everything I Wanted To Play With At Age 9. Rudy takes pity on the plethora of badass toys, mostly because he understands their plight of feeling different. I'm really spelling this out for you, huh? He swears he will get Santa to help them and deliver them to needy bastards.

Well, Rudy makes it back to the North Pole, but g.d. it Santa's sleigh is totally fogged in. Rudy starts to feel dejected and has just lifted the bottle of Johnnie Walker to his lips when lo and behold Santa notices Rudy's awesome nose and decides to give him a whirl. Rudy saves the day, the toys are delivered and are happy, and the Bumble ends up hanging out with Yukon and a paper towel full of Kettle Chips (the paper towel is folded into a funnel by Sissy Emmons). And it's a Merry Christmas for all!

The whole story is narrated by the tightest snowman who ever roamed, Sam, played by Burl Ives. Sam actually looks like Burl Ives, which is crazy/tight. I have put some pics for comparison. Also, who can rock a pocket watch like Sam the Snowman?

In the end, Rudy just wants to be loved, and so does Hermey and the Snowman and even Yukon, although methinks he is somewhat asexual. I love this show and I want you all to watch it with me next Christmas. I will make hot cocoa and we will fly to NYC to visit Chaps and cry together at the Rockefeller tree. This could go on and on and it's time for my bath. However, please watch this video compilash of some amazing Yukon footage.