So this movie comes on TBS way too much, but I usually stop whatever I'm doing to watch it. It's one of those that I have memorized. I can't remember when I first watched it, but I do know that I instantly wanted it to be my life. It's got some of the best nerd characters of all time, including Anthony Michael Hall, who turns in the best performance of all time and then actually grew up to be pretty good looking. I didn't realize until I was in my twenties that John Cusack is one of the nerds. Why did it take me this long - I guess we'll never know.
So Sam is so awkward and wearing funny hats and has bright red hair. I had a red-headed friend around the time I saw this movie for first time and I think Molly Ringwald was her damn role model. Sam luuuuuuuuvs Jake Ryan, who has two first names and probably a 401k because he is way too old for this high school. Jake Ryan was the apple of my eye during this time. I mean, who didn't want the hottest senior to like you? I used to drive past the hottest senior in my day with my window rolled down, blaring the White Album because I thought that was the formula to become a badass. I'm not sure if he was impressed or not, but to this day I still believe I could've had a Jake Ryan sitch, and don't ruin it for me.
Sam's family forgets her 16th birthday (A TRAVESTY) and goes to school pretty disgruntled. Also, her annoying older sister is getting hitched to a dumbass so her whole family is in town. Including her grandparents' foreign exchange student, Long Duc Dong aka my hero. Later he has a scene with his jock girlfriend on the elliptical machine at a party that is forever imprinted in my mind.
In study hall, Sam writes a silly note about her crush on Jake Ryan and tries to slip it to her friend but (thank you John Hughes) JAKE FINDS IT INSTEAD. OMG!!!11! This was my worst nightmare after I saw this movie and I actually took a long sabbatical from passing notes. Thank goodness, AIM came into my life shortly after this, so I could talk about my crushes electronically and while wearing my 1997 Lamar Scotties Spirit Squad work-out gear.
At the same time, Farmer Ted (Anthony Michael Hall) is crushing bad on Sam. He makes every effort to get close to her, but mostly is a creepball. She gives him the brush-off. Jake Ryan is interested, it turns out, and looking to break up with his annoying girlfriend anyway (who appears topless in this movie for a reason I think is a little unnecessary).
I think we all know how this movie ends. I want to wrap this up to talk about some things. Basically, Sam helps out Farmer Ted by loaning him a pair of undies so he looks cool with the nerds. Good thing. He helps HER out by talking to Jake Ryan. Farmer Ted ends up waking up/making out with Jake Ryan's now ex-gf and all is right in his world.
In the end, Jake Ryan shows up on the day of Sam's sister's wedding and is waiting outside her house. I basically had a bowel movement when this scene happened because, let's be real, this is every girl's ultimate dream whether you want to pretend you don't care or not. I love when he points at her and is like, "Yeah, you." GAWD I wait for that part everytime. Then he buys her a cake and tells her to make a birthday wish and junk.
So next time this is on TBS, please watch purely for Farmer Ted and the scene where he mixes a drink for Jake Ryan. Watching that scrawny s.o.b. make a martini and then offer up olives makes my world go round. Also, please pay close attention for the scene where Long Duc Dong gets wasted and ends up in the front yard. All I want to say about that scene is, "AUTOMOBILE?"
Love this flick.
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