i'm buying plane tickets right now

I don't even know where to start. Loss for words. I guess I should start by telling you I have an unnatural obesession with monkeys doing thangs. I love when monkeys dress like humans and smoke cigarettes. So sue me! I just can't help myself. I think this explains my extreme love for Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp.

I've had a pretty good life so far. Lots of trips, great friends, wonderful job. Nothing has made my life better than this video clip my dad just sent me. Honestly, I want this played at my wedding, every anniversary, the birth of my children, and my funeral. Also, someone needs to immediately book me a trip to Japan so I can see this for myself. So tight.

So, in Japan, they are having a pretty bad time with restaurant bankruptcy. So to curb that problem and save money, this one restaurant has hired MONKEY WAITERS.No, read that again and then take a deep breath. They are fully allowed by the health department as long as they wear their MINIATURE UNIFORMS. Calm down. They only work two hours a day, but they help with everything, from taking food to customers, to bringing back change to your table, to ANSWERING THE PHONE. Can you imagine asking a monkey for a beer and he brings it to you? I need a Xanax. Basically, I will marry the first person that can get me to this restaurant and I will bear your children if you find me the exact monkey that is clapping at the end of this clip. OH LAWD.